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Welcome to a delightful little blog brought to you by the nerds at Who Gives A Crap.

What the crap is carbon, really?

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What the crap is carbon, really?

For everyone who kiiiiiiinda knows.

Let’s begin with a conversation that we wish was made up, but is just two real people from our office who are trying their best. Let’s call them Amber and Jonathan. 

Amber: Hey, what’s carbon?
Jonathan: Amber! Come on, we talk about it all the time!
Amber: I know, can you just remind me? 
Jonathan: Sure. It’s like a, um… gas? Hold on, I used to know this.
Amber: … 
Jonathan: It’s bad, I know that. Ugh, let me think.
Amber: So you don’t know either.
Jonathan: Listen, I know it has a footprint! 

If our office is home to a couple of Ambers and Jonathans, we figured that there might be a few more out there. We get it! This stuff is complicated and science-y and often involves maths. But don’t worry, this is everything you need to know about that crap carbon everyone is talking about.


Carbon who? 

First of all, you’ve been lied to. Carbon is not the problem. Carbon is just an element on the periodic table, named after the latin word for “coal.” When people throw around words like “carbon footprint,” they’re actually using “carbon” as a shorthand for carbon dioxide (CO2), the most common greenhouse gas. No wonder Amber was so confused!


So get rid of the CO2! 

We appreciate your moxie, but we need carbon dioxide to keep our planet warm. It blocks in the sun’s heat so that it doesn’t escape into the ether. Without CO2, our oceans would freeze and we’d be very cold. Freezing! Literally! We’d be dead, if you didn’t catch that. But right now, the blanket of carbon dioxide covering the earth has gone a little past cozy. Think itchy and suffocating – like the worst wool jumper.


If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the greenhouse!

We think gas is hilarious. Greenhouse gas? Not so much. As a little refresher, we’re talking about gases like carbon dioxide that trap the sun’s rays in our atmosphere, making it like a greenhouse. Get it? Pretty clever name, eh? As we mentioned, we need some greenhouse gases to keep our planet warm. Too many greenhouse gases, however, is too freaking hot. 


Ok, but how does CO2 get released? 

By burning fossil fuels.

We think gas is hilarious. Greenhouse gas? Not so much.


What are those? This seems like it should be it’s own blog post! 

Hold on to your underpants, this might blow your mind. Plants and animals are partially made of carbon. When marine life (and nearby flora and fauna) died millions of years ago, their remains accumulated at the bottom of the ocean. Over time, they were buried under mud, sediment and sand. The immense heat and pressure from being buried under A LOT (like a whole lot) of sand turned the organic matter into oil and gas. Today, when we drill for the oil that powers our world, we’re touching life from hundreds of millions of years ago.
 

So you’re trying to tell me that I’m driving around in a dinosaur? 

Sort of! Everything that requires fuel (cars, airplanes, power plants, barbeques, etc) uses these carbon-rich materials from the past. When we burn them, they release heat, energy and, most pertinently, carbon dioxide. 


And that’s why people talk about carbon footprint in relation to travel and such? 

Yep. A carbon footprint is how much carbon dioxide is released because of a particular person’s or group’s habits. In other words, it’s how much fossil fuel is burnt to support your decisions – which can encompass everything from flying a plane to eating a bagel. 


But it has nothing to do with feet?

No, nothing to do with feet.


If you’re looking to reduce your carbon footprint, try 100% recycled toilet paper! Because we don’t cut down virgin trees to make our toilet paper, our production process involved a lot less carbon dioxide. It’s a win all around for the planet (and your bum).